Live-blogging the "Bones" season finale tonight for my audience of two.

Holy crap, the wait is finally almost over.

Here's the deal: During the month of March, I was unemployed and addicted to crack/MSNBC. I traded that crack when the primaries were giving me really bad trips for heroin/"Bones" and fell deeply in love with the show, just in time to start reading spoilers that would cause me great distress.

Well, not distress as much as anticipatory anxiety, but in a fun way and not the way that it used to cause me to avoid eating due to the fear of possibly vomiting.

No, I'm exhilaratingly excited about tonight's episode and will be live-blogging, because I know I have a very faithful audience of no people at all. In the meantime, I also posted a new Huffington Post article about spoilers, for which Eric Millegan was kind enough to go on the record.

HuffPo: **SPOILING** the Fun of Finale Season

Read more

Thank you for the distraction, Zooey.

Today is the Pennsylvania primary, 78 years since the last one. One freaking state votes today, and in the past 78 years (six weeks), the race between Sens. Obama and Clinton have had me calling for rawhide and quoting "Fatal Attraction."

So don't fuck this up, PA. I'll be seeing Zooey Deschanel and M. Ward (She and Him) at Webster Hall tonight so I don't have to think about this bloody primary. I have a special place in my heart for Zooey Deschanel for two reasons: She's Emily Deschanel's sister and they're both fantastic, understatedly talented actors, and Zooey and I were born on the exact same day - January 17, 1980. So I'd like to think that I'm just as cool. But I'm probably not.

Also, I am going to try to lay off "Bones" spoilers. See, it's a rough addiction, this show. I actually have pretty excellent things coming up, but they're not coming up until May 20th - the day after the season finale. I could 'splode, I really could.

Read more

MySpace Greatest Hits: Why I'm Acting Again and an Addendum to the Last Post

Since I said I've saved my best posts for MySpace until actively trying to maintain this one, I thought I'd put up a recent 'Space post explaining why I've returned to the out-of-work entertainment industry. I'd link, but my profile is private.

And in a previous post, I begged a certain actor on "Bones" to assure me via email that he would be returning for Season 4, and he totally did. (Woah!) Well, he didn't tell me anything, but he did email me. At the risk of spoilage, I won't say who it was or what my concerns were, but understandably, he could not tell me very much, since that would likely get him in a bit of trouble. But if you want to read the same spoilers I did, get thee to Searching Bones. (Though, to be honest, it was not because he read this blog and responded. No one reads this thing. Not even my mother.)

But here is that post from April 8th. Context: It was written after a lackluster performance by yours truly. The People's Improv Theater in NYC is where I have produced and performed sketch comedy (not as much as I'd like), either with other sketch groups or through classes with the unbelievably hilarious and talented Kevin Allison. The Girly Girl Burleskapades was a weekly show featuring a host and a few comedy-burlesque/burlesque-comedy acts. This was my post-mortem after I hosted April 4th. I'm glad I was wearing a wig.

So, okay - not hosting material

Well, my short run with the Girly Girl Burleskapades is over, at least in the capacity as host. Why? Because frankly, I wasn’t good at it. I don’t think I’d go so far to say I bombed, or even tanked, but I definitely sucked. And please, don’t think I’m going around bashing myself or that this is some sort of self-esteem thing, because I can rock it onstage, trust me. I just don’t like talking to audiences.

Part of what I love about performing onstage is the separate world created on the actual stage, where the audience gets to pry into the business of fictionalized people, and actors get to play out scenes in raw, real time. I’ve never had the chance to do a real, red-meat scene, where the emotions would get so flared up that I and everyone onstage, and in the audience, all feel so freaking awkward like we just found out something monumental and life-changing and all the blood rushed into our ears at the same time. That whole feeling of "Should I, um, leave?...Oh, I guess I can’t" gets kinda screwed for me if I have to depend on an audience for a response as opposed to someone off of whom I’m acting. I hope I’ll get to do that one day.

I’m not saying "fuck you, audience," but you really cramp my style if I have to acknowledge your existence while I’m doing my thing. Please, just sit back and watch, laugh, cry, feel moved or awkward, and all in the dark, while I do the things to make you feel that way under the hot, unnatural lighting. (Which, by the way, makes it easier for me not to see you. No offense, but that’s what’s cool.)

As for film and TV acting (this is to my friends who direct me in such things), I still love that too, and fully plan on doing that as I venture out into the crazy acting world again. (Like an idiot.) Because let’s face it, who doesn’t want a second chance to really nail a scene? I will not complain for a second about doing 60 takes of something if it means that the 59th take was perfect and we got a really good goof on the 60th. (Who doesn’t love outtakes? [Note: I know - I'm obsessed with bloopers. I'll write about that another day.] ) And Sean, Mike and Pete, if you’re reading this and thinking I’m full of shit because of the "Jamie-sure-is-pissy" Ghouligans shoot recently, trust me - I’d do it again.

And you can still do a "red-meat" scene on film. It can be edited to show nuances in reactions, or it can be one long "I’m-freaked-but-I-can’t-look-away-is-this-really-happening" single take. I hope I’ll get to do that too. Shoot, I hope I’ll get to write a scene like that one day.

So, this is my thing now - I’m going to try acting again. I’ve attained a low-key job so I can get out of the house and build up some funds, and hopefully I’ll be taking classes this summer. [Note: I will be taking those classes - this was written pre-interview.]

...

I’ll keep everyone posted on PIT goings-on, but I urge everyone who can to check the place out and see shows! It’s cheap, sometimes even free, and it’s all original comedy!

Do it!

Read more

I read spoilers. Now my heart hurts.

As usual, I was on Searching Bones reading about the perfect show, and I was stupid enough to read spoilers. I have mixed opinions on spoilers, and there are some shows for which I refuse to read them. (Like "24" - won't read them.) But I read "Bones" spoilers, and since I allowed myself to become ridiculously invested in every single character on that show, I got really emotional at my desk this morning upon reading one of them.

I won't repeat it here, I'll just direct you to the article in question. And if the actor in question wants to shoot me a really quick note to inform me of their status next season, that would be really swell...

Read more